The Devil's Encyclopedia: C
Conservapedia
Conservapedia, also known as Hickipedia, is an unintentional humor site started by some of the 46 to 53-year-olds from Bumblefuck Elementary's Leg-Up Program. The Conservapedia editors started the site as a result of their foaming-at-the-mouth opposition to Internet encyclopedia Wikipedia for political differences. Even though Wikipedia is an academic site as opposed to a political site, and political topics make up a slim minority of the site, the Conservapedia crew was more than willing to take up the cause, as minorities are what tend to trigger their rage in the first place. Those running Conservapedia have several things written in Wikipedia that have angered them, and have skipped the obvious conclusion that on a user-written site such as Wikipedia, they could have just changed the text themselves. Still, with a site as big as Wikipedia (at the time this was written, Alexa-ranked as the #9 highest-traffic Internet domain), there are many users of all sorts, which upset Billy Bob, Bubba Joe, Bubba Joe's brother/father/cousin Scooter, and the rest of the Conservapedia Hick Brigade. "We're going to start our own Wikipedia," cried Billy Bob one day, "just like how last year we invented that new crop, soybeans." Not content to just segregate a Wiki for conservatives, they made a list of future segregated ventures, such as schools, drinking fountains, and sections of public buses.
Satisfied that they could avoid seeing Wikipedia articles that were filled with numbers and other facts rather than the unbased assertions copied from "The O'Reilly Factor," Billy Bob and the crew set out to make their segregated Wiki which they ran from their treehouse with the sign "No Girlz Allowed." The sign was later modified to include liberals and scientists as well. The Conservapedia Possum-Eatin' Posse explained that although Wikipedia is an academic site, they have disputes with all the academics, too, such as allegations by Wikipedia that the Earth revolves around the sun and that phrenology is a less than effective means of assessing guilt for criminal actions. A separate conservative academic base, Billy Bob insisted, is made entirely out of superstitious theories that have been discredited centuries or millennia ago. Billy Bob then noted that the Wikipedia has a flaw in that most of those in charge of the user-written site think of themselves as liberal, since having watched enough FOX News, he knew that it is impossible for someone to have any sort of political affiliation without distorting all facts involved in an academically-related discipline to turn them into political propaganda. "The portion of the Republican population that knows how to program for the Web is almost 4% as big as it is for the left-wing," noted Scooter, "and the portion that isn't trying to burn educational institutions to the ground for making them feel bad about themselves is almost 14% as big as the portion of the left-wing, so that e Republican staff should be about 80-85% of their editorial staff." The Conservapedia editors felt that they should show Wikipedia the ropes by leading by example, and using their editor status to make their pages a giant sea of Republican propaganda.
Conservapedia is tied strongly to its enforced politics, writing its Wiki rules under the name Commandments, forbidding use of the labeling B.C.E. and C.E. for Gregorian calendar dates instead of B.C. and A.D., and insisting that unicorns are real because there is slight mention of them in Christian scripture. The editors hope to use it for home-schooled children of social conservatives so the children will not have to leave their cages and face the dangers of social interaction at a public school, where they might encounter different races, different sexualities, I.Q. levels above 75, or other things that the parents find unfamiliar and scary. Conservapedia editors feel that the segregated site might help people to avoid being exposed to differences of opinion, as well as people in general who are not exactly like them. "It helps to avoid other sets of thought on sites I visit," noted Scooter, "because if I don't see it, then it can't be true." Indeed, Scooter is committed to the attitude, often hiring two men with a large, opaque, rectangular pane to block minority races out of his view. If the site is functioning correctly with respect to its organizational model, home-schooled children soon can be forcefed propaganda on their computers heavily patrolled by types of NetNanny software, instead of venturing into the dangerous and subversive realm of independent thought which might help them realize that their parents are idiots.
Conservapedia has been awarded Parody Site of the Month, Best Acting Portrayal of the Mentally Challenged, and Comedy Goldmine of the Week by various websites. However, all three awards were rescinded by the sponsor websites upon learning that the site was intended as serious. Conservapedia also tends to be by far the most frequent butt of the jokes on satirical Internet site The Devil's Encyclopedia.