The Devil's Encyclopedia: F
Freedom Fries
Freedom fries are a type of food served in the U.S. House of Representatives, although now under a different name. Freedom fries are often known as French fries, or more often just as fries. Despite the name, there is no added freedom in the consumption of the food, except for the freedom from the top button of your pants, which will pop off after eating enough. For example, eating freedom fries is not an effective means of obtaining a pardon for criminal offenses, except in the case where the criminal offenses were committed as part of serving in the president's administration.
Freedom fries are usually served as a side item to an entree. Frequently they accompany entrees that can be eaten by hand such as hamburgers and sandwiches, especially when the entree is similarly unhealthy. Sometimes efforts are taken to improve on the health quality of the food, such as by air-baking the freedom fries, although in such cases they may have to take other names such as freedom air-bakes. The start of the name is attributed to a North Carolinan restaurant named Cubbie's, and gained popularity in the U.S. with the U.S. invasion and occupation of Iraq. It declined greatly as these Americans had to put their feet in their mouths and no longer had room for freedom fries.